It's been 53 days since my mother suffered her stroke, 53 days since her life changed, 53 days since she changed. My mother was always a very reserved quiet person. Almost secretive, even when dealing with her sisters. But post stroke, she is a chatterbox, she literally talks non-stop, even if the person she is speaking too has left the room.
It's an interesting change that everyone, except my mother, finds enjoyable. She has trouble with the lack of control. But that's what the stroke did, it took away the control she had over her life and the control I had over mine.
Pre-stroke, I considered myself to be ambitious and driven, but life has a way of putting you in your place, putting you back in order, putting you back on track. To make a long story shorter (if possible), I had lost a great deal of my drive and passion. My work became WORK, and I hated it and the demon I worked for. My "boss" was the definition of toxic....evil, spiteful, biased, rude, arrogant, and clueless to her own faults. Please, don't get me wrong, I've worked for both men and women, they both have their pros and cons, but this woman was the worst of both worlds. The only way we got along was when my behavior mirrored the horror of hers. Only problem was that I was not willing to become her for a pay check. You know, that whole comprising my integrity thing.
Sorry, but I don't believe you have to be hated and feared by your staff to be effective. A N Y W A Y.....eventually I hit my limit, but I was not in a position to just quit my job, so while I waited on a transfer, I still had to cope with my daily interactions with the DEVIL. What I needed was a remedy or an alibi....thankfully my doctor provided me with a remedy (the Pills portion of Prayer & Pills).
In this modern insanity, its not uncommon for someone to be living with the assistance of Xanax/Zoloft/Valium, but for me, I never considered it to be an option. I never considered it until I truly plotted out how to murder my boss....I needed medical intervention.
Two weeks after filling the doctor's order, my mother had a stroke. The Power That Is knew I was going to need all the help I could get to survive what was coming up. It took a day or two for me to realize that the medical intervention was not about my CRAZY boss and work issues, it was to prepare me to handle what was on the horizon. My mother needed me to be focused on her, not splitting myself between work needs and her needs. My bosses toxic behavior turned my love of service to the people into dread. I was ready, willing, and able to let my job go, and the morning my mother called I did.
It's been 53 days since my mother had her stroke. This is not our whole life, this is just Wednesday, April 13, 2011.
It's an interesting change that everyone, except my mother, finds enjoyable. She has trouble with the lack of control. But that's what the stroke did, it took away the control she had over her life and the control I had over mine.
Pre-stroke, I considered myself to be ambitious and driven, but life has a way of putting you in your place, putting you back in order, putting you back on track. To make a long story shorter (if possible), I had lost a great deal of my drive and passion. My work became WORK, and I hated it and the demon I worked for. My "boss" was the definition of toxic....evil, spiteful, biased, rude, arrogant, and clueless to her own faults. Please, don't get me wrong, I've worked for both men and women, they both have their pros and cons, but this woman was the worst of both worlds. The only way we got along was when my behavior mirrored the horror of hers. Only problem was that I was not willing to become her for a pay check. You know, that whole comprising my integrity thing.
Sorry, but I don't believe you have to be hated and feared by your staff to be effective. A N Y W A Y.....eventually I hit my limit, but I was not in a position to just quit my job, so while I waited on a transfer, I still had to cope with my daily interactions with the DEVIL. What I needed was a remedy or an alibi....thankfully my doctor provided me with a remedy (the Pills portion of Prayer & Pills).
In this modern insanity, its not uncommon for someone to be living with the assistance of Xanax/Zoloft/Valium, but for me, I never considered it to be an option. I never considered it until I truly plotted out how to murder my boss....I needed medical intervention.
Two weeks after filling the doctor's order, my mother had a stroke. The Power That Is knew I was going to need all the help I could get to survive what was coming up. It took a day or two for me to realize that the medical intervention was not about my CRAZY boss and work issues, it was to prepare me to handle what was on the horizon. My mother needed me to be focused on her, not splitting myself between work needs and her needs. My bosses toxic behavior turned my love of service to the people into dread. I was ready, willing, and able to let my job go, and the morning my mother called I did.
It's been 53 days since my mother had her stroke. This is not our whole life, this is just Wednesday, April 13, 2011.
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