It has been 270 days since my mother had her stroke and 45 days since I let my sibling know what I thought of him and his inaction. In the last 45 days my brother has been the model long distance son, calling often and making promises with no deadline. At first he was coming for a week at Thanksgiving, then it changed to pick my mother up and taking her back with him after Thanksgiving, and somehow now its moved to after Christmas and right before the new year. Although I am not surprised, I am baffled how any child, raised by loving parents, can make the conscious decision to NOT to be there for them when needed. My brother has not been to visit our mother since June of this year, and he only came then because my mother's older sister suffered a massive stroke and passed away. He came for appearance sake, offering little support to my mother, or the rest of the family.
I placed my mother in respite care for 3 weeks, simply because I could no longer subject myself and my sons to the constant process of caring for her. If you've never been a family caregiver, you can't understand how hard the responsibilities are to bear. And no matter what you do, you will always feel like you are not doing enough. But through her tears and mine, I continue to remind us both, that this is not our life, its just Thursday, November 17, 2011.
I placed my mother in respite care for 3 weeks, simply because I could no longer subject myself and my sons to the constant process of caring for her. If you've never been a family caregiver, you can't understand how hard the responsibilities are to bear. And no matter what you do, you will always feel like you are not doing enough. But through her tears and mine, I continue to remind us both, that this is not our life, its just Thursday, November 17, 2011.
